When Silence Became My Answer

Anytime we talk about ghosting, maybe as a guy, we do not usually agree or admit to doing it, but the truth of the matter is, maybe consciously or unconsciously, at some point in our lives, we have done it before. Personally, when I ghost an individual, it is just a means of coping and survival, and it is not that I am proud, wicked, or something.

I can remember two scenarios like that. Around 2023, there was this close female friend of mine that I cherished our friendship so much. We texted, called, shared gist together, and all. But along the way this friendship started becoming so draining for me that every talk we had was about complaints, and favors started to look like demands. And at that moment, the more love I tried to give, the resources, the time I gave, and the strength were all draining my soul out, and that was when I realized that I can no longer give out what I no longer have.

In my country, where everyday life itself is filled with a lot of stress and struggles, from making ends meet to a bad economy to long traffic on the road at times, I have learned that my peace of mind is so priceless and like a rare jewel.

And if a friend is always trying to suck that peace out of me, then I always think twice if I should hold on a little longer or just let go immediately. So, I woke up one day and I determined without thinking too much about it that I am going to stop answering her calls unlike before, her WhatsApp messages will be ignored I also stopped trying to make contact. I did those things not because I am wicked or I disliked her, but It was a conscious decision I had to make do that I can breathe well.

A lot of people always try to push it but if you ask me to avoid unnecessary arguments and explaining myself the reason why I'm doing that, it is just best to go silent, and did i regret my action, No!

So, for me, if I decide that I am going to ghost this particular person, it is not that I am being wicked; it is all about safeguarding my peace and safeguarding my sanity. Even though it brings memories, if at all I could go back, my peace of mind would still be protected at all costs, but there will be sincerity

However, from ghosting, I have learned that if I decide to stay silent during my ghosting phase, it does not mean that I am not there; but it shows that I am passing a clear message across that i can no longer continue like this. A lot of people might not get this right, but it is conscious determination and decision. And most times, the best thing to do is to take my leave quietly with courage than to stay back and give explanations that no one is ready to understand.

And in this act of ghosting, I have also gotten to understand what real human connection is, because at the end of the day, some bonds will be broken and will not last forever; ties fade, and by that I get to rediscover the path back to myself.

Thank you for reading.

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